Teddy Bears and Memories

Yesterday was Teddy Bear Day at school as part of our National Lutheran Schools Week. Now, you would think that this day would be no big deal, even a little silly, and for the most part, it was. However, I managed to locate my one and only teddy bear I think I have ever had, and of course it brought along all sorts of emotions, reminiscings, and nostalgia. I have had this teddy bear nearly 30 years.......(gasp! I swear I don't feel that old!). This teddy bear was given to me by my dear godfather and uncle on my very first Christmas when I was only a few months old. Of course I didn't know them and neither did he how special this little bear would become. That same uncle passed away much too soon and that little bear has always been my strongest tie to him. I still have memories of running to greet him whenever we got the chance to visit, bouncing on his knee being silly, and candy leis that he would bring with him were always favorite gifts.

My own son has his name, the first boy born into our family since his passing, and it will always mean so much to me for my boy to carry this wonderful man's name. From all the stories I have heard  about his childhood I imagine my John is a little like him as well.

This little teddy bear sat on my desk all day yesterday and I would look at it and think of him. On my mind all day. I know I will see him again someday, but for now I still miss him. I will just have to squeeze my bear a little tighter for now.

Here's to a New Year!

2015 was so good to us. I think one of my favorite years. Always filled with stress, but this time it came with more hope, more confidence, and lots of joy. We entered this year and endured it with our heads more above water than we ever have been before. Our family is moving in positive, good directions.

I got the chance to be a stay at home mom, and while I may never feel like I got my fill of it, I am so very blessed to have gotten a taste of it. I have also been blessed with probably the very best full time job I could imagine at this point in my life. Both kids get to spend all day in the same building as me. I even get to teach one of them!!!! If you had asked me a couple months ago, it was the WORST decision ever. We struggled for a bit there and really butted heads. However, things really seem to have settled and I am grateful I get to see him every day, all day, because he is just growing too darn fast! My sweet boy is growing up faster than I care for him to. I also get to keep a close eye on my baby all day as well. There isn't a teacher in school that doesn't know that if someone is going to fall and hit their head, it's going to be her. She is so accident prone and so clumsy!

All in all this year we have solidified more and more as a family, and our two beautiful children have grown and flourished. It hasn't come without grief by any means. We have had allergy tests, ER visits, and a few bouts of sickness that have made our home look like scenes from a horror movie. We reached the end though, happy, mostly healthy, and going strong.My heart is truly full to bursting.

The hardest thing of this year has been living a full year away from all our family and friends that we left behind. We haven't made as many trips back home as we would have liked, and there have been many occasions that we have just wanted to jump in the car and drive home! But then we look at where we are and how far we have come because we followed our dreams. Our family is thriving here and for that we are grateful. It has, however, made everything soooooo much better having my sister and her family here. Two precious babies that we get to watch grow up. Those twins have definitely been a highlight of 2015 as well.

One highlight we were so dearly looking forward to was Christmas at home with ALL of our family there (even though going back and forth from family to family is crazy AND stressful). We were so looking forward to seeing everyone and really catching up for almost a week! Well, life had other things in mind for us this holiday season. As soon as we pulled into our hometown, both kids began showing signs of sickness! Ella quickly turned hers into croup while John kept a nice steady pace at a bad cold. Luckily, Daddy is a super awesome respiratory therapist and we took croup in stride and did what we needed to do. However, fevers worsened, sleepless nights continued, and troubles grew. Christmas morning dawned on a very tired family not at all in the Christmas spirit. We watched and waited while things just didn't improve, so about halfway through the day we headed to the ER and stayed there a good portion of the day. Ella ended up with croup, strep throat, and tonsillitis.....NO FUN!!!! We spent the remainder of the trip trying a enjoy a few moments here and there and attempting to recuperate a tiny bit.

Luckily the remainder of our Christmas break has been fairly quiet with a lot of rest. We rang in the New Year with a small group of people, a LOT of noise, and tons of fun! Happy New Year to everyone who reads this. We love you all.